Hello! I am Nathanial and this is primarily where I have my Sims stuff.

Novel Writing and Short Stories of Camar'a Sere'th in Chronological Order are Here
The World of Camar'a Sere'th has a Website!
For all of my fandoms and my writing on Tumblr go to My Tumblr
For Sims on Tumblr go to My SIMBLR

This journal is public and you don't need to add me to download or browse, though I will more then likely friend you back if you friend me! I love comments, and especially constructive ones! I will always try to reply as communication is a two-way street.

I am a Member of Pixel Trade so you can use my sims in your legacies and stories!

 

So, after more than 4 years, MeadowHaven (My main hood) bites the dust.  

 

Graphics card change happened and now whenever I am doing anything in that hood I get ‘Activation Violation’ Error and crash. Also, sims are purple flashing messes even if I do manage to load a lot -sigh- 

 

I 50/50ed and still cannot fully get rid of the Activation Error. So I am starting fresh in another (clean) version of the game to try a new and different kind of neighborhood. Without shaders, and my graphics on medium, it is playing along, for now. I don’t trust it though. 

 

I may try to salvage the sims from MeadowHaven in Simpe down the road but with the game being as crash happy as it is I’m just waiting to see if a fresh game will make a difference? If the game wont play with a new hood with different CC then :/ I hope so, otherwise, the only thing I have left to try is to just do a reinstall of all the games and even when others with the Access Violation Error have done that, sometimes even that doesn't work...

 

 

~ The Vita.S (Book of Sacred Life)

 

Each individual Ellearn has a unique and incommensurable Destiny that determines their proper course in life.  Having a Destiny meant that the Ellearn were bound to Fate, which decided one’s allotted years, and the extent of one’s lifespan. As with Destiny complete, the Ellearn begins to shimmer and finally, peacefully, passes on.
 

"Live following your Destiny, that essential nature deep within that is the will of Fate and your endpoint. Once yours or others decrees have been finished, rejoice as the life journey comes to a close."
 

To understand and act upon one’s Fate is the ultimate goal of an Ellearn’s life. Fate directs the individual towards Destiny and Ellearn philosophy fills them with the joy of accomplishing what they were meant to accomplish. Each individual Destiny cherished and cultivated to conform to the decree of one’s personal Destiny preserves each person’s authentic singularity (and individuality.) “For nothing is as good as bringing about what has been decreed by the Divine, for what Fate has decreed is called nature and nothing is as good as realizing one’s Destiny and seeing it through.”
 

To love one’s Fate is to accept it and relish in it, yet this outlook should not be mistaken for fatalism. To the Ellearn it is very important to reject fatalism. There should be a joyous acceptance of the singular Fate that makes each Ellearn a unique individual. This joy is born from the fact that there is wiggle room within the bounds of Fate, as Fate is open to the full scope of people’s strategy and ingenuity in maneuvering through one's Fated span.
 

There should be no resignation in the heart of an Ellearn, only a sense of welcomed certainly for what is to come. One should actively engage in the future, not just resign yourself to what is to come. The possibility of knowing Fate meant that one should bring it to fruition through active participation and effort, cultivating one's Fated span.
 

The goal of such a view was to force the Ellearn to focus on the important things they could control such as cultivating their own and their families destinies whilst avoiding, thinking upon those things they could not control. These uncontrollable things would be wealth, life-span and societal position (class) as these are dictated by others so they should not be concerned with. This philosophy was a wish to change the Ellearn people’s views of what is and is not important, and to redirect people’s energy and efforts from those external concerns to the important internal concerns (family and the self.)
 

Those who resent their Fate cannot change it, they will simply not learn from their experiences, and will only have a hardening heart. "To attempt to destroy the natural outcome of one or another’s fate will end in disastrous results, and those who do not follow their destinies distort their heart and ruin many lives."
 

Fate is a duty; it is purpose and inevitability of the change in the Universe. "We may regard the present state of the Universe as the effect of its past and the cause of its future."  All Destinies are linked through patterns in the stars and tied then to astrology. Fate is seen as a decree by the Gods, giving oneself an opportunity to tie themselves through their Destiny to the Destiny of the world itself.
 

What is Destined is under the control of Fate and there are no ethical calculations involved.  “As our Destiny is out of our hands, an Ellearn should never be judged upon his Fate.”

 

Fate from the viewpoint of those it affects is either normative or destructive, and one works as best as they can within its bounds to correct it, but must ultimately understand that Fate is more powerful than we and as pieces upon the Divine board we simply play our parts.

Nathanael has a background of the acceptance of fate as the Ellearn all have destinies. In this way, he is no more special than the rest of his ancestors and for this reason, the idea of accepting his own demise is normalcy. Drefan, who was his biggest influence as a child, is human and comes from a background that says, ‘Fuck Fate’ (though this would change in Drefan’s later life,) and this duality leaves Nath pretty confused. With his masochism being why Nathanael is called a monster by his father in a conversation the child eavesdropped on Nathanael clings to his own fatalistic and self-hating tendencies in his resignation of what is to come. ‘I deserve this. I’m just a monster; perhaps through this fate, I will be redeemed.’  Martyrdom.

 

However, this outlook is actually incorrect even to the Ellearn, this fate bound species do not believe in simply laying back and allowing fate to do what it will. Ellearn philosophy states that you work with fate, that you strive to fulfill your destiny, but in a manner that is correct to yourself. This allows fulfillment of not only the Gods plans but your own within that fated framework.

 

This comes to be understood by Nathanael, at last, toward the end of his seventeenth year. The Prince begins to understand that yes, there is give and take within his fate. He must defeat Drefan, yes, that is his destiny, but Reinn wants him to kill Drefan. Yet, destiny only says 'Defeat’ so Nathanael can choose to save Drefan instead. His acceptance of his fate morphs in and of itself alongside his own character growth. He evolves, at first he is a child who resigns himself to terrible comings because he believes he has no right to stop what is coming. Nath becomes a young person who says, 'I will play your game, but I will play it by my rules. Even if you win, I will have no regrets that I pushed, and I strived and I did everything in my power to make this fate, right.’

 

Nathanael would go on to play to his own strengths, unwilling to give up his scruples to fulfill destiny. He knows that destiny must be completed, so he says, 'Even if I go about this a bit unorthodox, fate will be fulfilled.’ So the adolescent takes oaths before the Gods to protect him. An oath of Non-violence and Peace to the God of Death so he will not add to those entering Death’s Halls. Alongside this, he takes a vow of Poverty before the Goddess of Compassion swearing to take no material gain and to give to others all that he receives. The Gods grant him their divine protection and even with no armor, arrows do not bite and weapons break upon impact with his skin. 

 

As a Death Dweller, he comes to accept his death not only fatalistically, but as an abstract concept. Meditating on mortality, the mysteries of death and dying and his anxieties and fear of his own death slowly evaporate. His act of throwing himself before his comrades to take incoming blows is no longer only an act of fatalism but out of an understanding that it is not yet their time to die. As Nathanael embraces the concepts of death and dying he will allow himself to die without a fight at his allotted time. 

 

But when he falls in a battle that once during book two, he stands before the God of Death and holds his ground. He holds a respectful tone but asks to be allowed back not for himself, but for his Guardians, his friends, and the Kingdom he will rule. Nathanael promises that when fate will take him, he will come, no matter what. Sjel’Nnharma who was once mortal says nothing but bows to the adolescent, sending him back to his companions as the Prophet of Death. Nath has fully accepted his impending death and been given additional lives until that day. Able to die and rise again multiple times so that he will live until fate demands his end. 

 

The Prince regains the throne, and time passes. He would become the parent to three. With the mind of a parent now, Nathanael becomes angry at the thought of his final death as he is now leaving his young children behind. For the first time since the opening chapter of book one Nathanael shows his anger at his fate. But here his anger, in the few months before his final death, is not for his sake, no, but for his children. It is for his kingdom that lies, still, in ruins and needs a King. 

 

But he made a promise and he will keep it. He won’t fight his fate, yet that anger remains. As the twenty-one-year-old gasps for breath with fluid-filled lungs, dying in his love’s arms, both he and his lover cry bitter tears. He realizes, almost blind from the tuberculous that he is allowed, after all those years of adherence to a script that would end with his drawn out and painful death by disease, to think that, 'You know what? I didn’t actually deserve this at all…’

and he dies. 

Sigyn was a Mother’s comfort,

but she was also soft laughter.

She was patience,very likely, 

more then I deserved.

 

A love of wee-ones

I cannot understand.

 

Sigyn was of lavender,

a calming of the shakes,

and the anxiety within,

and without.

 

-

Acala, 

Black ebony at my throat.

Immovable One.

Fudo-Myoo is a heavy weight,

against the back of my neck.

His presence known to me

By lying over my shoulders.

 

He is the wrath that I feel,

at injustice, the righteous

anger that bubbles too close.

But he to is the wisdom 

to know when to back down,

and when to stand my ground.

 

Lithium Vortex’s Confidential Mashup Dress recolored.



6 Peasant Skirt recolors with Mel’s 3t2 White Bell Blouse.

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Andi and Grim’s ‘Devil’ Costume Face Effects Edited: 



I removed the lipstick on both Edits. Edit two also has the Eyeshadow removed.

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The last of the walls and Floors defaulted!

 

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